Trailer Watch: The Forbidden Kingdom

A few weeks ago a trailer for Jet Li's new movie, The Forbidden Kingdom, was leaked onto the web.

After watching that video I was excited, it's a trailer for a potentially great martial arts film. From everything I saw it had the all the makings of a Kung Fu classic; beautiful cinematography, amazing fight choreography, a dark villain, Jackie Chan as a Drunken Master (something only a man with Chan’s range of balance and movement can really pull off), and of course Jet Li. Hell they even made the kid from Sky High look sorta bad-ass.

I did my research on the movie and saw that the writer’s (John Fusco) big credits were the Young Guns movies and the Director (Rob Minskoff) has done a bunch of Disney flicks (including The Lion King). The synopsis made the movie sound less like a Kung Fu Epic and more like The Never Ending Story for a new generation. Needless to say my excitement was waning.

Last week the official American version of the trailer was released.

Just as I suspected, the movie looks more Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (the one where they go back to feudal Japan) than Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. I’ll wait to watch this one on HBO after the millionth showing of Eragon.

Bonus Trailer:
My Name is Bruce
Starring: The man, the myth, the Legend…Bruce Campbell.

Awesome!

It's a Boxing Day Miracle!

Last week, when I wrote about the various Late Night Hosts returning to work, I mentioned that both The Daily Show and The Colbert Report would remain in repeats. I am pleased to admit that I was wrong...

Stewart & Colbert return January 7th!!!!!!


The pair released a quintessentially Stewart/Colbert like statement announcing their return.
“We would like to return to work with our writers. If we cannot, we would like to express our ambivalence, but without our writers we are unable to express something as nuanced as ambivalence.”

Both Stewart and Colbert have been ardent supporters of the strike, so like Leno and Conan, they will return without their writing staff. Doing either The Daily Show or The Colbert Report solo is a tall task. Unlike the network late night shows, both shows put much more emphasis on "written" segments and less on interviews. But if anyone can pull it off, it's these two.

On a related note; it appears the negotiations between World Wide Pants and the WGA are not going so well. If a deal doesn't get done then Letterman and Ferguson will also be returning to the air without their writers.

Don't worry, I won't leave you on a sad (and slightly scary) note though...

Merry X-Mas from Haters to the Left

A holiday treat for you...People falling on the ice at Rockefeller Center.






As a bonus treat, check out Pop Waffle's "A Charlie Brown Christmas"


For more Pop Waffle check them out at Myspace.com/popwaffle

Box Office Blitz!

This is a big weekend for new movie releases. After a few weeks of big movies trickling into the theaters the studios are going to try and take advantage of the long holiday weekend and lonely Jews on Christmas with a bunch of big releases.

Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story
D: Jake Kasdan
C: John C. Reilly, Jenna Fischer, Tim Meadows, the Apatow Gang
Be sure to look out for The Beatles being played by Paul Rudd (John), Jack Black (Paul), Justin Long (George), and Jason Schwartzman (Ringo). There is also, Frankie Muniz as Buddy Holly and Jack White as Elvis. Second, actual rock stars making cameos.
I’m just happy this Judd Apatow produced (he also co-wrote with Kasdan) movie is finally coming out, maybe now they can cut the shit with the over the top promotional campaign. It has been insane; John C. Reilly on TRL, really?!?!? They have been pushing this movie so much I was beginning to see Reilly’s face in my sleep. Can you imagine how bad it would have been if Will Ferrell was in this one? I think even Apatow realized how sublimely ridiculous it has been, which is why we got this gem.

Sweeny Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
D: Tim Burton
C: Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter, Sacha Baron Cohen, Alan Rickman
Tim Burton brings this Stephen Sondheim musical, about a wrongly imprisoned barber in Victorian England out for revenge, to the big screen. After Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Big Fish, and Planet of the Apes, I have little faith in Burton (who used to be one of my favorites). I am interested to see if he returns to form working with this dark and bloody material. I have no idea what to think about the prospect of Johnny Depp singing, but I did hear him describe his singing voice as a little bit David Bowie, so that works. Also, Depp really can do no wrong in my book (and that’s after seeing The Libertine). And then there’s Alan Rickman; I would vote for Rickman for President, Article 2 of the Constitution be damned!

National Treasure: Book of Secrets
D: Jon Turteltaub
C: Nicolas Cage, John Voight, Helen Mirren, Diane Kruger, Ed Harris, Justin Bartha, Harvey Keitel
Not content with finding treasure worth enough money to end world hunger, save the rainforest, cure AIDS, stop global warming, and pay for all of Lindsay Lohan’s blow in 2007 (A LOT!). Cage and gang are back for another whacky treasure hunt; this time with Abraham Lincoln, John Wilkes Booth, and The President’s Book of Secrets.

Charlie Wilson’s War
D: Mike Nichols
C: Tom Hanks, Julia Roberts, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Amy Adams
Based on George Crile's book about the CIA's largest and most successful covert CIA operation, the arming of the Mujahedeen in Afghanistan. The operation was engineered by Charlie Wilson (Hanks) a liberal Texas Congressman and a rogue CIA Agent (Hoffman). The pair manipulated the US Government and a host of foreign officials in order to assist Afghani rebels in their fight against the Soviets in the ‘80s at the end of the Cold War.

Fun Fact: Those rebels funded and armed by Wilson and Co. went on to become the military arm of the Taliban. You know those wild and crazy guys that protected Osama Bin Laden. Ouch.

I Notice There is Still No Jon or Stephen

It appears that late night TV is going to get slightly less shitty…First a little history lesson.

In 1988, two months into a WGA strike that had shut down Hollywood, Johnny Carson reluctantly resumed his hosting duties on The Tonight Show without writers. Letterman soon followed. Both Carson and Letterman spent a lot of time “winging it”, trying to fill time and keep their respective shows going. To give you an example; Carson at one point filled time by viewing snapshots brought in by Tonight Show announcer Ed McMahon. Letterman on the other hand would look into the camera and simply state how much time was left till the end of the show.

Fast forward to the current WGA strike. It was announced on Monday that Jay Leno and Conan O’Brien (hopefully sans the creepy beard) are going to be following in Carson’s footsteps and will return to hosting the shows, without writers, on January 2^nd.

All the late night (and late late night) talk shows have been in re-runs since the beginning of the strike on Nov. 5^th (except for Carson Daly who is not WGA and could not risk missing an extended period of time and getting canceled altogether). Both Leno and Conan have decided to cross the picket lines so that their 180+ non-writing staff doesn’t get fired. On Tuesday Jimmy Kimmel announced he would also be returning on Jan. 2^nd minus his writers.

These two announcements came on the tails of the announcement (there has been a lot of announcing) that David Letterman’s production company World Wide Pants, which independently produces The Late Show with David Letterman & The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, is independently negotiating with the WGA to allow both shows to come back with FULL writing staffs. World Wide Pants is negotiation outside of CBS which makes it more likely that the WGA is willing to grant them the necessary waivers. Both shows could return by Jan. 9^th, if not sooner.

CBS has tried to distance itself from the World Wide Pants in order to remain aligned with the other big studios. It seems crazy that none of the big corporations are willing to get a leg up on the competition by going against the grain of the “old boys club”, and negotiating independently with the WGA. They are all willing to sacrifice during this strike for the sake of solidarity. We shall see how this shakes out for them in the end (although with more money than God, I am sure they will be just fine).

Sadly The Daily Show and The Colbert Report will remain in re-runs. That’s still infinitely better than watching Leno without writers (just thinking about it makes me want to dip my eyes in Kerosene, light them on fire, stomp them out with a poo covered shoe, and bury them).

Spears is Pregnant!

OK Magazine confirms that Lynne Spears, mother of Britney Spears, can expect another grandchild soon. Britney seriously has the most potent womb ever, and she must curse it every day. This poor girl is obviously struggling worse than a roofied sorority girl after a frat party to take care of herself, let alone adding a third child to her brood of neglect…

Whaaaat? It’s Jamie Lynn Spears who’s preggers? But she’s only 16! She’s on a Nickelodeon show for Pete’s sake.

It’s no wonder Lynne Spears’ book on parenting has been put on hold “indefinitely”. Hasn’t anyone is the Spears family heard of a condom? You would have thought after the epic tailspin Britney went through this year (whenever you are near her at this point you can literally hear the sound of planes screaming towards the ground. Or is that just her new album?) Mama Spears would put Jamie Lynn in a chastity belt (it's an Everlast!).

Look, I’m not advocating abstinence by any means, but I am advocating nobody in the Spears family giving birth for the next ten years…at least.

I’m sure the folks over at Nickelodeon are just thrilled to death over this. They dodged a huge bullet earlier in the year when the Hannah Montana pregnancy turned out to be false. No such luck this time though. I wonder if there is going to be a very special episode of Zoey 101 (the show starring Jamie Lynn as the title character) in which Pacific Coast Academy has its very first Prom Night Dumpster Baby. What’s next, Dora the Explorer gets knocked up by Diego, while Spongebob Squarepants gets high on Meth in the hot tub at the Beverly Hills Hotel?

Thankfully Britney is not pregnant, but she is reportedly getting married again. People are calling this future alimony recipient “a poor man’s Kevin Federline”. Wow, considering Federline is the poor man’s Snow; this guy must be a real winner. Oh, she is also refusing to get a prenup again, because if you refuse to learn from you mistakes (or even acknowledge them) then it’s like you never made any. Right?

How long after these two are married by a drunk, one-legged, midget, Hindi, Elvis impersonator in a Reno Chapel/Kennedy Fried Chicken, do they get divorced and he gets half of everything she is not already giving to K-Fed?

This seemed appropriate...

Trailer Watch: Dark Knight Full Trailer

Last week I posted a shitty quality bootleg version of the new Dark Knight trailer. Today I make amends. Here it is in its full glory...man am I excited for this movie.



Also, if you go to see I am Legend at an IMAX theater, you get to see the Dark Knight prologue; it's basically the first 6 minutes of the movie. Of course this has already leaked online, you can check out the bootleg video here.

Hungover and Confused

When I first came across this image this morning I was perplexed. I wasn't really sure what I was looking at. I figured my beer soaked brain was playing tricks on me. I decided I was better off consuming my hangover remedy (sausage, egg, & cheese from Gray's Papaya and a gigantic coffee) before trying to focus on figuring out the mystery behind this puzzler.

What I couldn't figure out at first was why is Helena Bonham Carter doing press for Sweeny Todd in her costume from Planet of the Apes? I realized that there is synergy as both movies were directed by her hubby Tim Burton, but it didn't seem to add up. Plus, she just gave birth so I concluded it must not be her.

Then I figured it must be Teri Hatcher, out doing some shopping in her free time while production of Desperate Housewives is shut down due to the strike. Nope.

Turns out it is was our buddy Michael Jackson the whole time. That's a very clever disguise Jacko!

I really love the unintentional irony in this shot. If you look closely, Jackson is standing in the Science Fiction section of Barnes and Nobel. He is the Science Fiction section!

Hell Hath Frozen Over!

Break out your fur lined puffy jacket Satan, it's gonna be a cold day in hell! Why the cold front in Hades? Because I actually agreed with Dr. Phil. I have to give credit where credit is due, Phil had the same reaction to the crazy lady who is convinced her dog is actually a human that I would; It's just a dog yah dumb bastard! Of course if it were me, every time the woman had a conversation with, or referred to the dog, as if it were human I would smack her on the nose with a rolled up Sunday Times paper and state loudly "NO!".


Speaking of giving credit where credit is due...

I am Legend opened up this weekend with just over $76.5 Million at the box office. That ranks 20th All-Time for an opening weekend. With good reviews, strong buzz coming out of the weekend, and The Fresh Prince, I am Legend is going to do huge numbers in the next few weeks. Don't be surprised to see it among the top box office earners of all-time.

Juno, on the other hand, grossed $1.4 Million this weekend (total gross $2.1 Million) in just 40 theaters (1.1% of the # of theaters for Legend). Juno had the highest "per theater average" for the weekend; averaging close to $15,000 more per theater than Legend.

In case you missed it last week, the Golden Globe Nominations were announced:
FILM
MOTION PICTURE - DRAMA
"American Gangster" - Imagine Entertainment/Scott Free Productions; Universal Pictures
"Atonement" - Working Title Productions; Focus Features
"Eastern Promises" - Kudos Pictures - Uk Serendipity Point Films - Canada A Uk/Canada Co-Production; Focus Features
"The Great Debaters" - Harpo Films; The Weinstein Company/MGM
"Michael Clayton" - Samuels Media and Castle Rock Entertainment a Mirage Enterprises/Section 8 Production; Warner Bros. Pictures
"No Country For Old Men" - A Scott Rudin/Mike Zoss Production; Miramax/Paramount Vantage
"There Will Be Blood" - A Joanne Sellar/Ghoulardi Film Company Production; Paramount Vantage and Miramax Films

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A MOTION PICTURE - DRAMA
Cate Blanchett - "Elizabeth: The Golden Age"
Julie Christie - "Away From Her"

Jodie Foster - "The Brave One"
Angelina Jolie - "A Mighty Heart"
Keira Knightley - "Atonement"

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A MOTION PICTURE - DRAMA
George Clooney - "Michael Clayton"
Daniel Day-Lewis - "There Will Be Blood"
James McAvoy - "Atonement"
Viggo Mortensen - "Eastern Promises"
Denzel Washington - "American Gangster"

MOTION PICTURE - COMEDY OR MUSICAL
"Across The Universe" - Revolution Studios International; Sony Pictures Releasing
"Charlie Wilson’s War" - Universal Pictures/Relativity Media/Participant Productions/Playtone; Universal Pictures
"Hairspray" - Zadan/Meron Prods./New Line Cinema in association with Ingenious Film Partners; New Line Cinema
"Juno" - Mandate Pictures/Mr. Mudd Production; Fox Searchlight Pictures
"Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street" - Parkes/Mac Donald and Zanuck Company; Warner Bros. Pictures

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A MOTION PICTURE - COMEDY OR MUSICAL
Amy Adams - "Enchanted"
Nikki Blonsky - "Hairspray"
Helena Bonham Carter - "Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street"
Marion Cotillard - "La Vie en rose"
Ellen Page - "Juno"

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A MOTION PICTURE - COMEDY OR MUSICAL
Johnny Depp - "Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street"
Ryan Gosling - "Lars And The Real Girl"
Tom Hanks - "Charlie Wilson’s War"
Philip Seymour Hoffman - "The Savages"
John C. Reilly - Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE IN A MOTION PICTURE
Cate Blanchett - "I’m Not There"
Julia Roberts - "Charlie Wilson’S War"
Saoirse Ronan - "Atonement"
Amy Ryan - "Gone Baby Gone"
Tilda Swinton - "Michael Clayton"

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE IN A MOTION PICTURE
Casey Affleck - "The Assassination Of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford"
Javier Bardem - "No Country For Old Men"
Philip Seymour Hoffman - "Charlie Wilson’s War"
John Travolta - "Hairspray"
Tom Wilkinson - "Michael Clayton"

DIRECTOR - MOTION PICTURE
Tim Burton - "Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street"
Ethan Coen & Joel Coen - "No Country For Old Men"
Julian Schnabel - "The Diving Bell And The Butterfly"
Ridley Scott - "American Gangster"
Joe Wright - "Atonement"

TELEVISION

TELEVISION SERIES - DRAMA
"Big Love" (HBO) - Anima Sola and Playtone Productions in association with HBO Entertainment
"Damages" (Fx Networks) - FX Productions and Sony Pictures Television
"Grey’s Anatomy" (ABC) - ABC Studios
"House" (Fox) - Heel and Toe Films, Shore Z Productions and Bad Hat Harry Productions in association with Universal Media Studios
"Mad Men" (Amc) - Lionsgate Television
"The Tudors" (Showtime) - Showtime/Peace Arch Entertainment/Working Title/Reveille Productions Limited/An Ireland-Canada Co-Production

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A TELEVISION SERIES - DRAMA
Patricia Arquette- "Medium"
Glenn Close - "Damages"
Minnie Driver - "The Riches"
Edie Falco - "The Sopranos"
Sally Field - "Brothers & Sisters"
Holly Hunter - "Saving Grace"
Kyra Sedgwick - "The Closer"

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A TELEVISION SERIES - DRAMA
Michael C. Hall - "Dexter"
Jon Hamm - "Mad Men"
Hugh Laurie - "House"
Jonathan Rhys Meyers - "The Tudors"
Bill Paxton - "Big Love"

TELEVISION SERIES - COMEDY OR MUSICAL
"30 Rock" (NBC) - Universal Media Studios In Association With Broadway Video And Little Stranger - Inc.
"Californication" (Showtime) - Showtime Presents In Association With Aggressive Mediocrity, And Then…, Twilight Time Films
"Entourage" (HBO) - Leverage And Closest To The Hole Productions In Association With HBO Entertainment
"Extras" (HBO) - BBC And HBO Entertainment
"Pushing Daisies" (ABC) - Living Dead Guy Productions, The Jinks/Cohen Company in association with Warner Bros. Television

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A TELEVISION SERIES -COMEDY OR MUSICAL
Christina Applegate - "Samantha Who?"
America Ferrera - "Ugly Betty"
Tina Fey - "30 Rock"
Anna Friel - "Pushing Daisies"
Mary-Louise Parker - "Weeds"

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A TELEVISION SERIES - COMEDY OR MUSICAL
Alec Baldwin - "30 Rock"
Steve Carell - "The Office"
David Duchovny - "Californication"
Ricky Gervais - "Extras"
Lee Pace - "Pushing Daisies"

Atonement leads all films with 7 total noms; Damages and Longford (?) lead all TV shows with 4 noms each.

I'm surprised The Sopranos only got 1 nomination (Edie Falco, Best Actress); Happy to see 30 Rock with multiple nominations, including best comedy/musical, Tina Fey (best actress), and Alec Baldwin (best actor). Javier Bardem definitely deserves the nomination for No Country for Old Men, but where is Josh Brolin or Tommy Lee Jones?

I will post my picks soon (there are still a few movies I need to see).

Trailer Watch: The Dark Knight - Cloverfield

Holy shit! The first full trailer for The Dark Knight was leaked online today, and it looks AWESOME. Heath Ledger is creep-tastic as Joker.
(It's a bootleg, so the quality is shitty)



Just in case this video gets pulled (which it will undoubtedly will), I won't leave you empty handed. Here is the first four minutes of the much anticipated J.J. Abrams monster movie, Cloverfield. You don't see the monster, but it still looks intense.

Canadians Don't Fuck Around With Safety, Eh.

Our neighbors to the north are serious about one thing, workplace safety! And Hockey of course, so two things. Can't forget Beer, three things. Oh yeah, Maple Syrup and Bacon. OK, Canadians are serious about five things; workplace safety, hockey, beer, bacon, and maple syrup. But especially workplace safety. Don't believe me? Then check out these two official Canadian Safety PSA's.





Holy crap! They really Tarantinod those spots. As if a fireball sending the guy plummeting 7 stories to his death wasn't enough, those crazy Canucks have him bounce not once, but twice off an oncoming dump truck! Or, the woman burning her face off with 4 gallons of boiling water wasn't horrific enough, she had to crack her head on the burner and set off a gas explosion.

Memories From the Summer: Coney Island - A Photo Blog

I just spent the past few days on my couch sick as a dog watching daytime TV... and by daytime TV I of course mean back to back to back to back to back episodes of Law & Order. Some things I learned:
- When a wife is found dead, it's never the husband that did it, it's always a greedy kid trying to cash in.
- A motion to suppress is inevitable.
- Vigilante justice is still murder.
- There are approx. 1 billion Russian prostitutes brought into this city illegally each year.
- Briscoe is the man (we knew this already)

Today is the first day that I am actually starting to feel a little better, just in time for the nasty winter weather. Snow, freezing rain, wind, you name it we got it here today. It is days like today, when I am fighting off the remnants of the flu and freezing my nuts off walking to the train, that I miss the warmth of summer.

To me, a Brooklyn boy, nothing says summer like Coney Island.

The Wonder Wheel

"Win Big Prizes"

You can't really see it because of the size of the image, but this mural has a bunch of crazy little sideshow freaks painted on it.

A ticket booth with the old Astroland logo. This booth has got to be older than me.

Nathan's Famous. There is nothing like getting a Hot Dog from the original Nathan's.

The Mermaid Parade

This is Too Weird Not to Post

The Wachowski Brothers (Brother & Sister?), the directors who brought us the supremely awesome The Matrix and the less than awesome sequels, are at it again. This time it's the live action remake of the cult classic cartoon Speed Racer, starring Emile Hirsch, John Goodman, Christina Ricci, and Susan Sarandon(!?!?).



I admit it, I have never actually seen an episode of Speed Racer, and judging by this trailer I am not seeing the movie either. I'm not quite sure what the fuck was going on there, but whatever it is, it doesn't look good. In fact, my first reaction after watching the trailer was "this movie looks like the Mario Bros. movie"...Not good.

I can understand why Emile Hirsch decided to sign on to this project. He is a great actor, probably even too good for this movie, but he has never received mainstream exposure. If he stars in a successful blockbuster (which this has the formula to be), then he is golden. Just look at Shia LaBeouf, a pretty good actor in his own right, but languishing in obscurity. Then he did Transformers (not to mention the surprising success of Disturbia) and now he is Hollywood A-List and starring in the new Indiana Jones movie (which will make him a household name).

And I can understand why Goodman is doing it, he needs the work. Last year he voiced the Dunkin Donuts commercial campaign and was paid in Munchkins.

But Susan Sarandon? Seriously?!?!?! First Mr. Woodcock and now this. Did she lose a bet? The woman has won an Oscar for Pete's sake. She doesn't need to be doing these movies. Glenn Close and Meryl Streep should find her, throw her in the back of a van, take her to an abandoned warehouse, and smack some sense into her. Can we make this happen?

I don't think even Hirsch and Sarandon can save this movie.

In other bizarre celebrity news...

Madonna would now like to be called by her middle name, Louise.

An insider reveals that the singer born Maddona Louise Veronica Ciccone “has started telling us all to call her by her middle name” - after 25 years of being Madonna and then Esther, the Hebrew name she adopted when she began practicing Kabbalah. The latest moniker change “has to do with the fact that she’s having an age crisis,” the insider says about the star… “She says she wants to go back to her roots!” Madonna’s rep denies the story.

This woman has gone through more names than Prince. Fuck that, for now on I will refer to Madonna as "Skeletor Arms" and Guy Ritchie as "Guy Who Can Do Better".

I'm Playing With MY "Dreidel" Right Now

Happy Hanukkah Bitches!!!!

Laziness Personified...Pass Me the White Castle

Lazy [ley-zee]
-adjective (-zi-er, -zi-est)
1.Averse or disinclined to work, activity, or exertion; indolent.
2.Jonah this weekend
Also See: Sloth

I was indeed the personification of laziness this weekend; I spent the lion's share of my two glorious days off parked on the couch, in a state that can best be described as somewhere between inert and comatose. The TV God's rewarded my torpor with a slew of classic movies including Welles' Citizen Kane, Kurosawa's Seven Samurai (at a shade under 4 hours long I didn't watch the whole thing at once, luckily it was on multiple times so I caught it piece by piece), Polanski's Chinatown, and Kanew's Revenge of the Nerds.


I also caught most of Hurricane (which is surprisingly re-watchable considering my dislike of everything Denzel) on Sleuth (one of those random cable channels that would have never existed without CourtTV and the OJ Simpson trial). What I love about Sleuth, other than the continuous re-runs of Miami Vice and Homicide: Life on the Streets, is the ironic 10 second graphic they put on the screen at the tail end of commercial breaks that informs you what you are currently watching. Shouldn't we have to investigate and figure it out for ourselves?


On Sunday I watched the Giants win yet another ugly game, while at the same time eating more White Castle Sliders than deemed safe by the US Surgeon General. This only increased my lethargy and pretty much guaranteed I was to be useless for the rest of the evening.

I am still working on the post I promised last week. I am doing some research and collecting videos (it's a full multi-media experience); hopefully I have it done in the next couple of days.

I love this:

RIP Evel Knievel

Evel Knievel, the iconic motorcycle stunt man, died today at the age of 69. Knievel, always decked out in his best bedazzled stars and stripes, was a national treasure who captivated audiences around the world with his breathtaking stunts.

Evel Knievel, the hard-living motorcycle daredevil whose exploits made him an international icon in the 1970s, died Friday. He was 69. Knievel's death was confirmed by his granddaughter, Krysten Knievel. He had been in failing health for years, suffering from diabetes and idiopathic pulmonary fibrosis, an incurable condition that scarred his lungs. Knievel had undergone a liver transplant in 1999 after nearly dying of hepatitis C, likely contracted through a blood transfusion after one of his bone-shattering spills.

Robbie Knievel has some pretty big shoes to fill if he hopes to keep the Knievel legacy alive...he sure as shit isn't going to do it if he continues doing Holiday Inn Express commercials.

Edie Falco Solves the Wrtier Strike!

I am currently working on a post that is taking me longer to complete than expected...

In the meantime, I leave you with a video from the Late Show writers, who caught up with Edie Falco...the footage is really quiet dramatic.

Paper Will Never Win!

A piece of paper beating a rock is almost as ridiculous as the ending to that M. Night Shamalamadingdong movie "Signs". You mean to tell me that aliens figured out inter-planetary space travel, invade Earth and terrorize everyone, but were completely unaware that the planet is comprised mostly of water...the one friggin thing that can kill them? You would think that if a species was planning an intergalactic raid, they would at least do a little research about their target first. That's like a kid with a peanut allergy taking a tour of the Planters factory. It's asinine...just like a piece of paper beating a rock.

(btw...I found this gem on FoundMagazine.com)

Speechless

On Thanksgiving day a group of WGA members launched the "Speechless" campaign, a series of black and white videos featuring A-List SAG members showing their support for the WGA.

The campaign was conceived by writer/director George Hickenlooper and writer Alan Sereboff after seeing the all the tremendous SAG talent out supporting the WGA on the picket lines from day 1. Hickenlooper, who directed Factory Girl, suggested a series of Warholesque screen tests with the talent remaining silent to show solidarity with the writers. Sereboff brought the Speechless concept to the table, where the talent would remain silent, eventually holding up a hand written sign that simply said "speechless". The two combined the ideas under one banner and within a few days had recruited a pretty impressive team including: DGA members Paul Haggis (Crash), Rod Lurie (The Contender), and Wayne Kramer (The Cooler) & WGA members Steve Pink (Grosse Pointe Blank) , Jill Kushner (Ellen), and members of the writing staff for The Tonight Show. Justine Bateman (that's right, Mallory Keaton), who is a SAG board member, played an instrumental part in recruiting the talent.

Already confirmed to appear in the campaign are:
Sean Penn, Holly Hunter, Laura Linney, Alan Cumming, Jay Leno, Harvey Keitel, Kate Beckinsale, Tina Fey, Tim Robbins, Gary Marshall, David Schwimmer, Patricia Clarkson, James Franco, Julia Louis-Dreyfuss, Martin Sheen, Josh Brolin, Susan Sarandon, Andre 3000, Chazz Palminteri, Jason Bateman, Christine Lahti, Patricia Arquette, Jenna Elfman, Olivia Wilde, Richard Benjamin, Paula Prentiss, Eva Longoria, Justine Bateman, Joshua Jackson, Rosanna Arquette, Diane Ladd, Rebecca Romjin, Minnie Driver, Nicollette Sheridan, Robert Patrick, Matthew Perry, Ed Asner, America Ferrera and the cast of Ugly Betty, Woody Allen, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Jane Fonda, Marisa Tomei, Ethan Hawke, Jason Alexander, Charlize Therone, Minnie Driver, and Philip Seymour Hoffman.

You can read more about it here.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Just wanted to wish everyone a happy and healthy Thanksgiving. Here's a little Thanksgiving fun...



Before I leave you, there is some guild news...no, not the Writers Guild...The Lollipop Guild! Everyone's favorite little people (that's what we call midgets now right?), The Wizard of Oz Munchkins, received a long overdue star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. No word yet from the International Brotherhood of Oompa Loompa's Local 109 on when they are receiving their star.

There is nothing creepy about this picture I swear!

Best Apology Ever

Last week Los Angeles Lakers Head Coach Phil Jackson got himself into some hot water by describing a recent Lakers victory as a "Brokeback Mountain Game" because of all the "penetration and kickouts". Apparently the NBA was not thrilled with this analogy, presumably because it might on some wacky off chance have offended a gay person. Jackson delivers one of the greatest sarcastic apologies of all time; thanking ESPN for making such a big deal about it and apologizing to any cowboys or horses that were offended.


Let me get this straight, Isiah Thomas can sexually harass a female employee, Stephan Marbury can sleep with a MSG intern in the back of a truck outside a strip club, James Dolan can try to cover the whole thing up, MSG can be lose one of the largest sexual harassment settlements in US history, and there is no repercussions. But Phil Jackson makes a "Brokeback Mountain" joke and he has to apologize the very next day?

If anything, Jackson should have had to apologize for making a "Brokeback Mountain" joke because its not terribly relevant. What's next Phil? A Bill Clinton joke?

Geek Alert: Watchmen Movie

Alan Moore's seminal 1986 graphic novel Watchmen, widely considered one of the greatest comics of all-time, is finally going to make it to the big screen. After years of rumors, false-starts, and a slew of different directors Watchmen is now filming in Vancouver with 300 director Zach Snyder at the helm. Directors Terry Gilliam (Fear and Loathing in Last Vegas, Twelve Monkeys) andDarren Aronofsky (Requiem for a Dream) had been previously attached. The current screenplay was written by David Hayter (X-Men) and was called "as close as I could imagine anyone getting to Watchmen" by Moore (although Moore has also stated he refuses to go see any Watchmen movie made).

Watchmen takes place in an alternate 1985 where costumed "superheroes" (only one in the story actually has super powers) are real and the US on the brink of nuclear war with Russia. Superheroes have been outlawed (various reasons including undermining police force) and have gone into retirement. That is until a murderer starts offing their own, which is where the story begins. A series of events causes a group of superheroes to come out of retirement to investigate.

Watchmen was innovative in it's deconstruction of the conventional"superhero" by turning them into real life people with real life issues. The superheroes in Watchmen, save for one, noticeably lack any super powers. They must struggle with their own inabilities, neurosis, and failings throughout the book.

Watchmen started as a limited series running from 1986 to 1987, it was then re-published in "trade paperback" form, helping to usher in the popularity of the Graphic Novel (think Sin City). It is the only graphic novel ever to win The Hugo Award (given for achievement in science fiction/fantasy literature) and was listed on Time Magazine's 2005 list of "100 best English Language Novels" (the only graphic novel to make the list).

If done right, Watchmen has the potential to be the best movie based on a graphic novel of all time.

If you are interested check out Watchmen 101 to get more details on the story.

Picketing with the Stars

Tuesday was "Picketing with the Stars" out in CA; tons of SAG actors turned out to support the striking writers. Check out this video courtesy of United Hollywood:


Highlights:
00:55 - Is Rob Lowe still dressing up as his character from West Wing? I wonder if he does all his interviews in character as Sam Seaborn. "Rob, what do you think of the strike?" "President Bartlett supports all Unions in their efforts for equality in the workplace." "ummm ok?!?!"

01:38 - Todd Bridges is on the picket line as part of a work release program. Favorite Line: "Don't make me come to your houses producers, cause I will"...I believe him.

01:48 - Sarah Silverman is wearing a Red Sox hat. I no longer find you funny or sexy. You are dead to me Silverman.

03:13 - Is that Stanley? You know Stanley is the key to the picket line's urban vibe.

03:41 - Ruuudy! Ruuuudy! Ruuuuudy!

"Mahzel Tov, It's a Celebration Bitches"

Jay-Z's new album "American Gangster" sold 425,000 copies last week to debut at #1 on the Billboard charts this week. Last week's #1 The Eagles "Long Road Out of Eden" fell to #2. Britney Spears' album fell from #2 to #7.

This is Jay-Z's tenth album to debut at #1 tying Elvis as second all time in #1 album debuts. The Beatles are first with nineteen #1 debuts, a seemingly untouchable amount.

Tying Elvis makes Jay-Z iconic, and not just in the hip-hop world. I am not a huge Jay-Z fan, but you have to respect the man. He is the King Midas of the rap world; everything he touches turns to gold...or platinum in his case.


In case you were wondering, the title of this entry are actual lyrics from the new album:
Rich niggas, black bar mitzvahs
Mazel tav, it's a celebration bitches, la heim
I wish for you a hundred years of success but it's my time Cheers,
toast to crime Number one b-boy, chain nigga rhyme

That's just plain genius!

Check out the video for the first single "Blue Magic"


Yes, that would be a wad of EUROS that he pulls out. It is a sad commentary on the US economy when rappers are pulling out Euros to show how filthy rich they are. The Euro now officially has more street-cred than the dollar. Jay-Z is the Gangsta Alan Greenspan.

Who Needs A-Rod?

Super Creepy Pope Benedict XVI

Screw A-Rod! Yankees Stadium will have The Pope in 2008. I hear he has a better agent.

Pope Benedict XVI will hold mass at The House that Ruth Built on April 20th. Tickets will be free, which I'm sure means it will be mayhem!

It's funny...I read the announcement and all I could think was "Did the Yanks re-sign Mo Yet?"

WGA Strike Continues...Week 2

Week 2 of the WGA Strike is underway and there is no end in site. Week 1 by all accounts was a success, great turnouts on the picket lines, nice public support from some big name SAG members, and a large rally at Fox (over 4,000 strong) to cap off the week. Week 2 is considered by most the first real test, will the writers resolve hold up going into a new week? I don't think the AMPTP expects it to.

The weeks and weeks of stockpiled scripts and episodes the TV studios claimed to have seem to be drying up after 2 weeks. Shows like Family Guy, The Office, and Scrubs (to name a few) are all out of new episodes after this week. Speaking of The Office, NBC let go of over 100 "below the line" crew members, a sign that they are preparing for a long haul (and apparently trying to send a message to Steve Carrel and the other striking cast members). There is also word that some studios have begun to threaten legal action against show runners if they don't return to work in their producer capacity. Studios are going to have to come up with filler for shows as they run out of new episodes.They will have to make some tough decisions on what to do with new shows and the shows were on the cusp of getting new episode orders. Right now they can claim they are saving money by not ordering anything new or funding new pilots and just sit back and be content with not losing money, but eventually the demand for new creative product will outweigh the merits of a schedule full of reality TV (right?). The pressure is certainly going to be building on both sides, it will be interesting to see how it starts to play out.

To keep things fresh and interesting on the picket lines WGA-W has planned a few "theme" days this week (and they don't mean have a pimps and ho's party). Yesterday was Veterans day and schools were closed, so writers were encouraged to bring their kids and families to picket with them and show support. Today is "Picket with the Stars", SAG actors will be turning out in force to support the WGA. Here is a list of actors already committed to show up at picket lines:
(via United Hollywood)

Army Wives – Kim Delaney, Brian McNamara, Sally Pressman, Drew Fuller, Wendy Davis, Sterling K. Brown, Brigid Brannagh
The Big Bang Theory – Kaley Cuoco, Simon Helberg, Kunal Nayyar, Jim Parsons
Big Love – Bill Paxton, Jeanne Tripplehorn
Brotherhood – Ethan Embry, Fionnula Flanagan, Kevin Chapman
Corey in the House – Rondell Sheridan, Madison Pettis, Lisa Arch, Maira Walsh
Cold Case – Thom Barry, John Finn, Tracie Thoms, Meredith Stiehm, Danny Pino
CSI: Crime Scene Investigation – William Petersen, Marg Helgenberger, Archie Kao, Marc Vann, Wallace Langham, Liz Vassey, David Berman, John Wellner
Desperate Housewives – Doug Savant, Nicollette Sheridan, Dana Delany, Tuc Watkins
Dexter – Keith Carradine, James Remar, C.S. Lee
Dirt – Ian Hurt, Josh Stewart
Everybody Loves Raymond – Ray Romano
The Game – Tia Mowry, Pooch Hall
George Lopez Show – George Lopez, Constance Marie, Valente Rodriguez
Grey's Anatomy – Katherine Heigl, T.R. Knight, KaDee Stickland, Amy Brenneman, Justin Chambers
Jericho – Ashley Scott, Bob Stephenson
Kyle XY – Jamie Alexander, April Matson, Chris Olivero, Bruce Thomas
Las Vegas – Vanessa Marcil
Mad Men – January Jones, Vincent Kartheiser, Rich Sommer
My Boys – James Kaler
New Adventures of Old Christine – Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Clark Gregg, Hamish Linklater, Alex Kapp Horner, Tricia O'Kelley
Numb3rs – Dylan Bruno, Diane Farr
Private Practice – Kate Walsh
The Riches – Minnie Driver
Rules of Engagement – Patrick Warburton, Megyn Price, Oliver Hudson, Bianca Kajlich
'Til Death – Brad Garrett, Kat Foster
True Blood – Anna Paquin, Sam Trammell
Wildfire – Lori Loughlin
Without A Trace – Poppy Montgomery, Enrique Murciano
Women's Murder Club – Scott Gemmill, Paula Newsome, Laura Harris

Other celebrities slated attend to support the WGA include: Ben Stiller, Lisa Kudrow, Frances Fisher, Camryn Manheim, Edie McClurg, Susan Savage, and more.

Tia Mowry huh? What, is Tamera too busy or something? Or is she just too good for this? Bitch!

Pretty impressive list, this has got to be a tourists dream come true.

This video pretty much says it all about the strike...
Voices of Uncertainty


And this is just great...

Trailer Watch: Major Movie Star

The trailer for Jessica Simpson's newest cinematic effort "Major Movie Star" hit the interwebs today. I liveblog this masterpiece below

Major_Movie_Star-Trailer
Uploaded by aszle

00:00:01 - blah

blah

blah

blah

00:00:20 - Steve motherfuckin Guttenberg!!!!

blah

blah

blah

00:00:55 - Is that Vivica Fox? It is! This must be the definition of rock bottom.

blah

blah

00:01:12 - Vivica needs a breath mint...and a new agent.

blah

blah

blah

00:01:40 - Simpson's screaming caused my brain to liquefy and shoot out of my ears. I'm pretty sure they are going to find me face down on my desk in a pool of my own blood. omit flowers.

blah

blah

00:01:51 - Vivica: "I think I just threw up in my mouth"...me too.

blah

00:01:55 - More Guttenberg!!!!!!!!!

blah

blah

00:02:18 - fin

I feel like I need a shower now.

Just a Thought...

...If there is a prolonged writers strike, who is going to write all the awards shows? Do they even have an Oscar broadcast? If they do, it will be interesting to watch these people come up with their own cute little quips and one-liners. Just like watching a trainwreck is interesting.

I can't believe I'm about to say this but...America would miss Bruce Vilanch.

Apparently the picketing was over at Time Warner yesterday which is not where I was. I apparently missed a pretty good turnout, including a ton of a-list actors showing up for support.

Today the focus of the picketing, both on the east and west coasts, was all at Fox/News Corp.

FYI...Next week's Office was the last finished episode before they shut down for the strike. Same goes for Family Guy. That mean if the strike continues past next week you can kiss new episodes of each goodbye. Word is the episode of the Office that was about to be filmed before shutting down was one of the funniest yet. I don't know if they are just messing with us by saying things like that, but the plot of the episode is Michael & Jan have Jim & Pam over for dinner. How can that not be funny?

Thursday Afternoon Randomness

- There is yet another recall of a toy made in China. This time around it's Aqua Dots, a popular toy used in arts & crafts projects. Aqua Dots are small, sticky, colorful plastic dots that can be arranged into different designs and fused together by spraying with water. Aqua Dots look and feel like little colorful candies, if ingested (and here is where the recall comes in) the glue covering the dots metabolize into the powerful DATE RAPE DRUG GHB. So basically, little kids are playing with a toy that looks like candy, they inevitably put the sticky candy looking thing in their mouth, and they are ruffied worse than a sorority girl on a Saturday night. Lead in paint is one thing, but toys that turn into date rape drugs? Come on, how do you let that happen? Who is your Quality Control guy, Creed Bratton?

Anyone going to the Aqua Dots party at the Delta House this weekend?

- Do you ever listen to your mp3 player on shuffle and come across music you didn't load onto the player? I'm not just talking about a song you forgot about, but a song you would never in a million years download. I seriously think my mp3 has become self aware...and it hates me. How else do you explain Tori Amos and DeBarge's "Rhythm of the Night" ending up on there?

- I walked over to NBC today to snap some shots of the WGA protesters and show my support, but they were nowhere to be found. Bummer. I'll try again tomorrow.

- Some of the strike captains started an "official" blog of the strike...United Hollywood.








- Ebony & Irony?










I will leave you with the trailer for There Will Be Blood, Paul Thomas Anderson's first movie since Punch Drunk Love. I don't know much about it other than that it is starring Daniel Day Lewis...that's enough for me, I'm sold.

Hey Hey, Hey Ho, I Saw This Episode Two Years Ago!

Well it happened. At midnight yesterday the WGA went on strike. Starting yesterday morning writers picketed in shifts outside of studios in both NYC and LA.

The writers are going to have plenty of time on their hands now, maybe they should consider using that time creatively and coming up with something a little more clever than "On Strike" for their signs.

The first casualty of the strike are shows that depend on a team of writers to create material daily based on current events including The Late Show with David Letterman, The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, The Daily Show, and The Colbert Report. Networks have announced that new episodes for these shows will not air for at least a week; repeats will air in their place.

Some shows like Cashmere Mafia, that were meant to be mid-season replacements, may or have been shelved for the time being just in case they are needed down the road to replace existing shows that run out of new episodes. Other shows like Lost or Entourage may not have enough scripts to finish a full season; Lost in particular may shorten its season to 8 episodes. Some shows, the Heroes spin-off for instance, have been canceled altogether.

Stars have also hit the picket lines as a show of support. Julia Louise-Dreyfus was on a picket line in the shadow of a billboard for her show The New Adventure of Old Christine. Amy Poehler was outside of NBC supporting SNL writers and Tina Fey, who writes and stars in 30 Rock, joined the shows writers as well. The Office star Steve Carell, who has a writing background, refused to cross picket lines and go to work yesterday. Jay Leno pulled up to the protestors outside of his Burbank studio on a motorcycle and handed out boxes of Krispy Kreme Donuts.

As the strike goes on more shows will go into repeats and we will see an influx of news shows (whose writers are part of a different union) and reality shows. Eventually they are going to run out of ideas for shows so I have decided to take advantage of this and pitch the following reality shows to the networks:

The Pimp hosted by James Lipton - James Lipton takes 12 dorky guys and turns them into pimps. The winner will get a pimped out green and gold (green for the money, gold for the honey) Cadillac Coup de Ville and his very own Ho train.

My Kakamayme Bat Mitzvah - spin-off of My Super Sweet 16, we follow a jappy Jewish 12 year old as she plans her Bat Mitzvah. These girls drive their parents crazy trying to have like the biggest Bat Mitzvah like ever. The first episode we will watch Shira as she plans her "The Devil Wears Prada" themed party. Marvel as Shira throws a temper tantrum because daddy bought her a silver BMW and not the pink one she wanted (keep in mind she is only 13).

The Real Housewives of Camden NJ - You've seen the Real Housewives of Orange County, now see how the other side lives. We go inside the most dangerous city in the country and follow the housewives as they live their day to day lives. In the first episode we see the housewives sit around gettin their hair did and talking shit about their baby daddies.

White Noise hosted by Rosie O'Donnell - Rosie O'Donnell talks about whatever she wants...the show won't actually be called White Noise, that's just the sound you will hear as blood shoots out your eyes and ears as you watch Rosie.

Rape Island with David Copperfield - No explanation necessary. The show sells itself!